Can I get a rewind?

Wasn't until I hit 30 that time seemed to just go, go, go. It was like I was now on a new watch and it was in fast forward, if I didn’t hurry I would miss out. So I tried to catch up, even tried to change all clocks in the house as if I would gain some timeage.

Nope, nothing worked, days turned to months, turned to years and then folks... then I realized OMGoshness in just one tiny small little bitty year my BABY will be 18. GROWN people, like BIG boy pants on do your own thing, wash your own ass, pay your own rent and figure out this crazy life on your own type stuff. I don't know about you but this saddens me like no other. I could not wait for him to grow up, learn some grown stuff like responsibility. He has drove me crazy for lack of better words. This is the one who gave the BIGGEST dilemmas in school, thought he was OG gangster and rebelled like nobody’s business. The one who knew everything, went from a skateboarder to a BMX rider to a rapper/tattoo artist all in a few years’ time. This is the same kid who would help the homeless man he saw under the bridge while on his many walking ventures, the same kid who sees greatness in all walks of life, shapes and sizes. 

He is the one everyone pointed at and ridiculed me about saying he would never make it out there. The very one that I never gave up believing in when everyone else did. He is the boy without a father, no male role model to guide him all these years, no one to show him how to be from a man's perspective. There is a HUGE line between involved and not, it sure does make or break a child. It is not the same to have your mom bear the weight of both, but by golly we made it, and we made it smiling. For all those times I didn't think I could go on, all those times I saw a lost path but kept pushing through, for all those people who said we wouldn't make it... 

LOOK at us now!! 

The road has been rough, with a whole lot of tears anxiety and fear, but with love in your heart and the shear dedication to never give up, you can change a child's world around.

Though he always thought I was mean, wrong and leading him to nowhere, I am PROUD to say I would not change a single thing about him. He is perfect in every way!